bearing it all

The beginning of September. My month of break time is over. I enjoyed the time away from the blog although I was never really far. I liked just being able to post a picture from our lives with no words. Had a little mystery to it. 

So, what have we really been  up to? 

During the month of July I was dealing with so much heat, both outside and inside my home.  Everyone had seemed to be getting on each other's nerves and we don't have too much space to give one another.  So pretty much on a whim I decided to drive 20 hours to Florida- which was hotter that ever- and give myself a break.  

The drive down was pretty good until the last three hours. I pulled over to the side of the rode, got out and sat down and cried sobbed.  How had I become this mother. It certainly wasn't the person I wanted to be. Angry, stressed, cranky and uptight.  I asked for help. I needed a change.  I slowly made my way back to the car. The boys were a bit out of sorts, but I assured them Mama would be fine. We just needed to get to G & G's with some serious quiet time. So please nap, read, stare out the window, but just don't talk to me.

We arrived at our destination and my help was there. I crashed for three hours while the boys took off with Grammy and Grampy.  These two, my-in-laws-, were exactly what we all needed.  

For the next two and half weeks I slept, read, reflected and had more time to myself than I knew what to do with. I never cooked a meal once. I know -how spoiled?  I was able to breathe and have some serious FUN with the boys. 

I am so grateful to my in-laws.  They are wonderful grandparents and parents.  So many people have asked how I can spend so much time with them without my husband.  We respect one another. I graciously accepted them as my second set of parents when Eric and I got married.  In return they accepted me as their daughter. I love them dearly and appreciate all that they do for our family.

So with some R & R under our belt the boys and I headed home. The return trip was such a breeze. Not one little breakdown. We were all so excited to see Eric. It had been awhile since we had been away from one another.  

We headed to the mountains for some family time.  The fresh crisp, cool air,  the lush green trees, the peaceful woods.  The slower pace of life. The calmness of it all.  What  my heart aches for. 

As we head into a new month and season, I am ready to live more simply, more slowly, more deliberately with my family and trust that I am enough.